Young Han (00:00):
Hey guys, I'm young, a full-time dad and a full-time professional with the goal to become the best parent possible. The girl dad show is my journey interviewing fellow working parents aspiring to be both good at work and parenting. I'm gonna do this by gathering and sharing unfiltered perspectives from my guest to join me as I research parenthood one interview at the time. Hey meetings. Nice, Anthony. Thank you so much for joining me on my show today. I really appreciate you taking the time outta your busy schedule.
Anthony Serina (00:34):
Totally, very excited to be here today.
Young Han (00:36):
Awesome. Awesome. Well, let's get right into it. I would love for you to share with what you do for a living.
Anthony Serina (00:42):
I'm one of the co-founders and co CEOs at reviving and at reviving, our mission is make hardware, lifecycle management, easier for enterprises.
Young Han (00:52):
That's awesome. And what are some of the big projects that you're working on right now?
Anthony Serina (00:56):
Right now, some of the big things that I have at least underneath my response is our new SaaS platform, which is in its current phase, which is being launched right now, which is pretty exciting. I head up all of our rep and repurposing at reviving and also is always, always recruiting and looking for great new talent to help us achieve, you know, achieve our goals.
Young Han (01:22):
You guys are going really fast. I feel like every time I look at LinkedIn, you guys have a new hire that you're welcoming to the team. It's a very, very exciting time for you. Right.
Anthony Serina (01:30):
You know, it's interesting because when you look at a lot of companies in terms of how COVID 19, you know, affected, affected them, when you look at reviving, we were adversely affected by it in, in the beginning, it was, it was, it was a difficult time at reviving. However, a year from that period, it has been our fastest growing time period in the company history. So I know you saw, you know, saw a lot of tech companies that had this like exponential growth during COVID for a bunch of different reasons. We're experiencing that right now a year afterwards.
Young Han (02:02):
Oh, that is really interesting. I'm sure there's a lot of different reasons and theses you have for that as well.
Anthony Serina (02:07):
You know, one of the biggest things for us is when offices shut down, there is no more supply of hardware, right? So as in terms of managing hardware, lifecycle management, you know, our bread and butter is end of life. And so, you know, all products that companies are no longer using. If it was broken, if it got refreshed, it was being sent back to their offices, but no one was actually in the offices. And so over after really, you know, the summer of last year, you start to see some things, show a little bit more life and just gradually picked up again. And now we're seeing now across the industry is all companies are now rebuilding. Their offices is for hybrid environments. And then they're also closing down their secondary and tertiary offices. And so it kind of all happened at once. It was like, as quickly as the offices closed down, it, it seems to be as, as quickly as, you know, they're reopening in, in limited capacity, I would say. And all the stuff over the past years has just been being sent to the offices, but no one was opening up those boxes. So it was just like tons of stuff all over the place. And, and we're just really busy right now. That's awesome.
Young Han (03:14):
Well, I'm glad to hear that things are coming around at the latter part of it. And that's really exciting to hear about that. I also know that you have some exciting things that have also happened in addition to your business during COVID right? Sure. You also had, yeah. I'd love to talk to you about like your kids cause that's right. So do you mind telling us about your kids? Like what kind of like, you know, how many do you have? How old are they? What are their names?
Anthony Serina (03:36):
Totally, I am a girl dad all the way through, so I have my oldest daughter, penny she's a little over two. She's gonna be, you know, almost two and a half. And then I have twin girls that were born in December. So they're, you know, roughly, you know, six, six months or so. So yeah, three girls, 21 months apart and yeah, they're doing good. Twins are finally like sleeping through the night, which has been amazing. So that's been going on for the past several weeks. Yeah. But it's been, yeah, it's been, it's been a wild ride. Isn't sure we all, as with you too, right. During COVID and kids and whether you have schools or, or childcare, you know, everything's been flipped upside down.
Young Han (04:19):
It really has been. And I know we talked briefly about it here and there, but I'd love to like, unpack that a little more with you today because I don't feel like we ever spend enough time talking about the kids and, and the similarities we have because we're both girl dads, like you mentioned, and we both have kids that are, you know, in their early single digit age, you know? And so there's a lot of like commonality that I don't think we ever really share about. So it'd be really great to know. I hear, yeah. Do twins run in the family?
Anthony Serina (04:46):
On my wife's side, they do, and you know it's really interesting because, you know, yeah. I mean, we actually, so this is funny. So when we were going through all the initial, like doctor visits and everything like that, they usually catch twins relatively early on in the process. You know, when they do the first, I don't even know what it's called. It's embarrassing when they, you know, when you see sonograms that, you know.
Young Han (05:15):
Yeah. Yeah. I know what you mean. Yeah. I don't know what it's called.
Anthony Serina (05:19):
Yeah we actually found out about the twins much later on after actually the first trimester. So we were caught really off guard that we were having twins because we also got told later on in the pregnancy. So, it was a pretty wild thing, but yeah, they came out, they're identical. They look identical. It's not easy to tell 'em apart. I mean, we can tell now during, depending on how they're sitting and their positioning and things like that, but the easiest way to tell 'em apart is actually, you know, their ears are pierced is just have two different types of earrings in.
Young Han (05:57):
You're serious. You pierced their ears.
Anthony Serina (05:59):
Yeah. All my girls have their ears pierced
Young Han (06:01):
Wait, is that was that, oh, I, I was gonna say, did you do that for twins to be able to tell them apart? It'd be amazing. If I had twins, I would be like, oh, how do I tell these kids apart? Yeah, totally. What's it like having twin? Cuz I've always wanted twins. I, I always told my wife, I'm like, gosh, I wish I could get a two for one deal on these kids. You know? So we can just bang 'em out so much faster. Right.
Anthony Serina (06:24):
So twins was like a lot in the beginning, but like everything as a parent, you really get used to it. And I think, I think one of the biggest challenges that we had was just, I simply, you know, you know, we don't wanna wake up a crying baby while when they're there's two of 'em. If one of 'em cries, they usually wake up the other one. And so that was just like settling them. So it took a lot of, it just took a lot of patience, but also just took a lot of time to recognize that you kind of have to make a lot of decisions, which is around. Sometimes you have to like, let you know if you want to, if they're both crying and you wanna settle one, it's really, really hard as a parent to do this, especially with three kids and you know, to my wife and I, so there's like two people, but yeah, if you wanna settle both of them and they're both crying, sometimes you just have to like leave the room that they're both in pick up one, settle one, put 'em in a room and then go back, settle the other one.
Anthony Serina (07:17):
And so you have to sometimes leave a baby crying in the beginning. And, and that was really, really tough for us. Also, the twins were Prees so they actually, we didn't, this is crazy. So this is in, this is like, you know, again, COVID wave two again in New York city, you know, I live in Brooklyn and when the twins came home, they were pre, they were born at thirty three, thirty three and a half weeks, but they were, they were fine. They were, they were, you know, over four pounds. It wasn't that scary. They were the NICU for about a week. They didn't need any assistance or anything like that. So when we brought 'em home, they just cried a lot. And we're like has it just been a lot? You know what I mean, said, you know, our oldest daughter's been a baby and we didn't really think much of it. But then after like a couple of weeks, we're like, this is like abnormal, kinda long story short. They ended up what ended up happening is cuz they were premature, their stomachs weren't fully developed and their stomachs were still developing after they were, after they were born. And as a result of that, they, they couldn't, you know, easily go to the bathroom and they got diagnosed as colic. So we had two, you know, coy babies for 90. It was, it was a 90 day period basically from after they were born. Yeah. It was, it was like pretty wild, but you know, it was like, like, oh, you know, I think everything's fine. We're like this isn't like this isn't how it was with penny and, and we, and we were right. But they're fine. They're healthy. You know, we're really lucky. I mean, it was, it was never a scare. It was just more from like a parenting perspective of just having the twins, you know, constantly be crying basically and being on kind of like lockdown, you know?
Young Han (09:00):
Yeah. And it's also double the trouble, like you said. Right. So it's not like it's just one kid crying. It's like two kids always crying together. Yeah. And then if they're both having the same issues, it's like, everything's double, but I'm also hoping that the joy is also doubles too.
Anthony Serina (09:11):
Oh totally it's amazing. And there's like so many cool things that they do. So like when you put 'em on the mat, they always lock arms. So when they're playing they're on their backs, you know, playing with the, you know yeah. Playing with toys or whatever, they like lock arms. It's like a small thing, but it's really, really cool. So they'll have their arms locked. That's wild. Yeah. It's, it's really cool. And then, and then also they're like beacons to each other. So like they can make each other laugh and stuff. So if one's laughing the way they're positioned, they can make the, you know, the other, you know, and Rosie, I don't actually think, do we say their names? The twins, they always get called the twins. It's so funny, you know? Yeah. But it's Gem and Rosie, Gem is the middle and Rosie's the youngest and yeah. They're like, obviously they're like best of friends, but like, that's just starting to happen right now. So it's, it's been pretty cool. Especially the past, like the past month or two months has been really cool because they're starting to sleep a lot more they're they're like hanging out, you know what I mean? And yeah, more aware, a little bit more aware. And also my oldest daughter now goes like on the ride board on the stroller. So I could like take one stroller and take three kids out. So that's like that's been pretty cool too.
Young Han (10:29):
That's awesome. So you do that even in New York, huh? You, you still just venture out into the streets and, and take 'em out.
Anthony Serina (10:34):
We're pretty much always in prospect park, Botanic, Brooklyn botanical gardens is right by us. So yeah, but we're always in all those places.
Young Han (10:41):
Yeah, that's another thing that I've always been curious about, like, you know, people that wanna raise their kids in a city environment. Right. Like I just like never like fathom it, you know, because I feel like there's so much happening, but there are so many parents in these cities, like raising their kids, you know, and it kind of goes to my next question is like, did you grow up in a city? Like, what was your childhood? How did you grow up?
Anthony Serina (11:01):
I was, I was actually born in Manhattan, but I identify as growing up in the suburbs. So I grew up in lower West Chester county in between Yonkers and Rochelle in a small town called East Chester. So it's right outside of the Bronx right outside of the city and we ended up there because my mom is originally from the Bronx and my father was from Manhattan and my grandparents had purchased a house in the same town that I ended up growing up in East Chester. So it was kind of like the whole family kind of getting out of the city. And so I grew up there. It was awesome. It was great. It, you know, one of the things that like we love about Brooklyn is my wife and I lived in Manhattan for 10 years and really Brooklyn's in between kind of where I grew up in Manhattan. So I grew up as like very condensed suburbs, still apartment buildings and stuff like that. But it's the suburbs
Young Han (11:56):
For sure. What was your childhood like? So you, did you have a, like a tight knit family and like, it sounds like you had a lot of extended family that was near you guys all in East Chester.
Anthony Serina (12:05):
I believe I have over 75 blood relatives in the New York city area.
Young Han (12:09):
I'm from a big family too. So I totally get it. I have a pretty massive, family.
Anthony Serina (12:13):
Yeah, are they all predominantly in the bay area?
Young Han (12:15):
Yeah, so my, mom's side's predominantly in the bay area, actually the whole of my mom's side is all in the bay area and my dad's side, mostly in Korea, but yeah, both sides were pretty big. And so like, I always kind of grew up in a big family and I have always envisioned and imagine having a big family myself, because that's just how I was brought up. Sure. You know, I just wanted like an assembly line to get food and like, you know, just like have a full, farm table where everyone has to like crowd in and eat or you have to eat in shifts, you know, like, I dunno if you've seen those memories,
Anthony Serina (12:48):
It'd be like the fold out tables, like attached to the dining table that would like make a table that's right. And then some people eating in the kitchen's it was hysterical. Yeah. It was always like that, you know?
Young Han (12:59):
Yeah. Yeah. There'd be like Christmases where we'd bite the whole extended family. And you'd like, you wouldn't even know like 10 of the people there. You're like, how are you? Yeah. You're like, you're the cousin of someone you're like, oh, this is awesome. Yeah. Yeah. I totally grew up like that as well too. And it was fun and I've always just envisioned having a big family myself, which is why I always wanted four kids and why I wanted twins so bad. So I was like, so jealous and I heard you're having twins. Cause I'm like, dang, if that kid like really like, get the bang for the buck, right. Short amount of time, get shovel the output. But I think we're gonna stick with our two and unfortunately we're gonna have to have to shelve the kid for kid plan. Yeah. Cuz that's not gonna happen.
Anthony Serina (13:39):
Yeah. It's, it's interesting one person gave me some advice, which I thought was interesting and I was like, you know, it's gonna be really hard or, or physically tiring in the beginning for you. But as your kids, you know leave the a toddler reach, he was gonna be pretty magical because the, the twins are actually only one grade apart in school from penny. So basically they're only be one grade apart. And that's right. The guy was, was telling me, was giving advice. He's like, he's like, they're always gonna wanna do the same things because they're gonna be maturing at roughly the, the same space. So he is like, mm-hmm, it's gonna be really cool watching them grow up. Cause my buddy was like, I have an eight year old and a three year old and he is like the three year old and an eight year old don't really have too much going on. And he is like, your children are gonna becoming of age all around the same time. And I thought that was interesting. Cause I never really thought about that.
Young Han (14:32):
Well, I think in a big family, like you can always latch onto a cousin or a sibling that was your age. It was very, very easy to find someone that was at your interest or developmental cycle. Totally. And you just like locked into that family member cuz there's like someone to, there's always someone to choose from. But my wife came from a small family as well too. And I mean, I think she might think it's big until she met my family and then she's like, oh, this is a really big feeling, but yeah. So yeah. So it's kind of an interesting parallel there. Are you, does that impact how you wanna have a family or are you gonna stop at three or what are your plans?
Anthony Serina (15:01):
I don't know. I mean, we always wanted to have like a baby, you know, and like our, we always were gonna have three kids, but our goal was to have like two kids as quickly as we could, you know, and terms of being separated from how far apart they were. And we did that, you know, because, you know, they're only 21 months apart. And then our, our goal was always to like, we're a little bit further on our careers, you know, when both kids were, you know, at diapers and kind of in school in some way, then a third kid. Right. And that was always, that was always the plan. So the plan was always to have three and then we got the twins and so, which is awesome, but I don't, you know, I don't know if a year or two from now, or probably realistically in like two or three years from now, if we're gonna still have that feeling about one and a half, like a baby around. And so the fourth to us is, is it's like an unknown, but I will tell you, you know, right now it's kind of even hard to think about that.
Young Han (16:02):
So when it's so physically demanding, it's so hard to think about. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember that stage. Yeah. It's the worst. Yeah. You're just so exhausted and hungry and just like tired and out. Yeah.
Anthony Serina (16:13):
We just started to get a babysitter again, you know, with the COVID and everything. Cuz now everyone's like vaccinated, not everyone, but there's a lot of people that are vaccinated and so forth. So last, last Friday was our first night since the twins were born that we had a babysitter come and Angela and I went out to dinner and it was like really, really nice, you know, and we're doing it again this Friday and that's what I'm saying. It's like, I don't like to think right now about number four if we're gonna do it or if we're not, but as you know, like as the kids get older and you get a little bit more time back. Yeah, yeah. Then I'll probably have the head space. We can think a little bit more about it.
Young Han (16:47):
So you said something very interesting, which kind of goes into like the stuff that I'm trying to wrestle with and figure out during this podcast is how, how other people are balancing work with parenting dude, you know? And like what does that look like? You tell me, dude, you're running, you're running a fast growing you tell me!
Anthony Serina (17:03):
I don't, Angela and I go through so many changes to our schedule. We're trying to find our rhythm. We've had some success, we've had other like, you know yeah. Other challenges and we're still reshaping it and we're still trying to figure it out. And we, we started this new routine, which has been really, really awesome lately. And it's that on earlier in the afternoon and then on Sundays, pairing that with where we actually have a babysitter come just for a couple of hours on Sunday. And I worked during that time period and when Penny's napping and so babysitter grabs twins, and then Angela has free time and herself as well. When I say free time, you know, the, you know, the deal, it's like planning out the day time. So that's been a wrinkle that we've thrown in there. That's been really nice and you know, look, I mean, our attitude about everything is it's been a really wild like, you know, year plus now, but you know, we're really fortunate and we have like the ability to kind of situate ourselves and, and figure out what care is kind of best for us and go from there. Yeah.
Young Han (18:26):
It's a hot topic in my household too. I mean, it's the same reason why I even like started this podcast. The whole point of the podcast is to be like, I can't be the only one trying to figure this out. there's gotta be other people struggling with this. Right? Like how do I, how do I be successful at work while I'm still being a successful parent? And I don't wanna sacrifice either, you know? And that's like, it's like a conundrum. And like my first, my first instinct was to like interview people. I was like, I'm gonna go ask other people. And then I'm like, I should record these. Cause these could be really interesting. And there you go. That's why the whole podcast started.
Anthony Serina (18:56):
How do you do like pretty much, I think the big thing right is the morning routine and the, the night routine. Right. And I think those are the really hard parts because I'm a really early riser and I have no problem at all, waking up at five o'clock or working out and home straight to work and coming home at five. I can do that, but my wife understandably, so with the three kids can't handle or I shouldn't say can't handle, she can handle it because she's the best, but that wouldn't be fair for her to have to handle the morning routine every day without me, you know? So I, how do you, how do you, how do you all deal with it?
Young Han (19:33):
It's been like a really interesting process for us. Obviously we're still figuring it out as well. And my wife are very different and I, I know we haven't talked to a lot about our significant others, but Amy and I are like polar opposite. Okay. And it's like the classic example of like, you know, opposites attract. I think she's like, you know, she's beautiful and a I'm ugly and you know, she's smart and I'm dumb, I'm just, I'm, I'm making jokes there. She really is pretty, but I, I, I more just saying like, we just have different perspectives on life. Right. And so I, I feel like, you know, I would much rather try to outsource some more of the stuff that we need to do. Like get a babysitter, like you, you, you talked about. And so we're starting to get to that point where, you know, she under, you know, she's like open to trying those things. And so we have a lot of these teenage kids here that want to babysit in our, in our neighborhood and I'm like, let's just hire them. They wanna work, you know, and they great with our kids and we could use the time, you know? And so even if it's just to do laundry, <laugh> like, you know, we could use the time, especially when you're home.
Anthony Serina (20:30):
That's right. When you're home, you have a lot of flexibility with, with care. I, I, at least I feel that way. And so does Angela, because, you know, you're there, God forbid something happened. You could like jump in and stuff like that. So I always look as like two types of care. There's like care when we're like physically present and then there's care when we're like gone, you know, like during the work day and stuff like that.
Young Han (20:51):
Yeah. No, exactly. That's a good point. And, but I'm a little bit different cuz Amy doesn't work. Right. So, well, Angela, She
Anthony Serina (20:59):
Got it. I dunno if I told you she stopped working when the twins came.
Young Han (21:03):
Oh, awesome. Was that a, is that like a joint decision or is that something that's gonna be permanent or semi permanent
Anthony Serina (21:09):
As long as we can make it happen, we're gonna try and, you know, see how it works out. But that's a work that that's also like another up in the ear thing. So she's been doing some consulting stuff on this side for a couple hours a week and she's enjoying that and we're just, we're just figuring it out. But really when the twins came, we knew that three kids under two years, you know, her job was extraordinarily demanding and required a lot of hours and you know, it was a mathematical, so does yours. Totally. Right. So, so, so, so it was like two of those together would just be really difficult and also stuff that we've talked about, you know, like where are we gonna live? Right. We've been renting for a really long time. What are we gonna do about the school situation?
Anthony Serina (22:01):
Where are they gonna go to school? What classes and you know, we had, we hadn't done any of that stuff. And so we just had a lot of person things that we wanted to accomplish together. And it would be difficult for us both to do that while working, you know, our schedule. So I think we've been play by ear. I think the goal is for at least this year, you know, for her not to work full time, but you know, it's the same thing. We're kind of she's, you know, it's the first time for her, her that she is, you know, full-time mom, full-time mom, which I feel like is almost, which is harder than way harder. It's way harder. So, you know, we're figuring it out, you know, it it's really an up in the air thing and we just say, Hey, let's, let's, let's give it a shot this full year and see how, and, and, and let's just kind of like check in and see where we are towards the end of the year.
Young Han (22:48):
It's really interesting because so many parents go different ways. Right. And I think a lot of the people that I talk to like struggle with this aspect of needing two incomes to survive. Right. You know, or to like thrive, I should say. And then, you know, for your, for you to have the ability to like, be able to make it work with one is, is a big deal. Right. You know, especially within our age group, a lot of our peers can't do that right now. And so a lot of parents are like struggling with this idea of do it, nor do they wanna do it. I've actually met quite a few people that don't wanna quit their jobs and they want to continue to work. And then they just outsource the, the nanny care during they work while they work. And then they take over it at night. Right. So no judgment either ways, but like, it's just really interesting that you chose to go down that road, which is becoming less and less common.
Anthony Serina (23:27):
It is, it is. And you know, it's also one of those things too, where it's really difficult to go from two incomes to one. And I think totally, I think everyone just goes about differently. I mean, my wife and I prepared for a really long time. And so we, you know, financially we were ready to have children, you know, you know, and I think, you know, the way we think about it is a lot of the, you know, milestones that you want to set. You know what I mean? You know, financially, whether it's for down payment on a house or things like this, we're really fortunate in that regard to, make a lot of those things happen. Obviously not all the things that you want. And so, you know, just kind of living off of one salary for the next year or two is isn't as scary basically. But I mean, long term, it, it would, it would probably be quite difficult, you know? So, so it just, but as you know, with work, it's like, I don't know what's gonna happen. Yeah. In two years from now with, with our company, that's where we're gonna be. And, you know, that's, that's the thing that you found at the company before is dealing with the ambiguity. Right. And so that's one of the things I think from our jobs, you get very comfortable dealing with ambiguity and, and it, I don't lose much sleep over that.
Young Han (24:42):
Yeah. There's not a problem that you guys haven't been able to overcome over the last five or so six years. It maybe even longer that you've been in business and I can't imagine you not being able to overcome the next set of challenges and the next set of challenges you guys are facing are actually good challenges that are like growth challenges. So if anything, you're gonna end up being, you know, probably on the net positive side of that equation, but it is interesting that you planned out your kids based on like some certain financial stones you like basically are very strategic about having kids.
Anthony Serina (25:09):
Oh dude. Totally.
Young Han (25:11):
I mean, it sounds a lot like how you work, you work like that too. You're very calculated in how you roll different initiatives out when you wanna spend money on one, when the timing needs to be like, you're also very calculated at work. So it's kind of interesting to hear how that parallel. So
Anthony Serina (25:27):
I think also like my wife and I waited as long as possible to like have children being that we got married when we were young, younger, at least for New York standards.
Young Han (25:36):
You know, what is that in New York standards? I'm from California now in Texas. I don't know what New York standards are.
Anthony Serina (25:42):
I didn't engage when I 27 married. Maybe when I was 28, I wanna say Angela's a year older me. Yeah. But yeah. I feel like most people in New York are married in their thirties and everything like that.
Young Han (25:53):
Yeah. That's really interesting. Yeah. Cause I feel like there's a lot of parallels with how you, how you operate, right? Like you, you work the business. Like you definitely don't like to make rational decisions and you, you definitely like marinate on things and make sure you, you enjoy the moment. Enjoy it for whatever it
Anthony Serina (26:08):
Is. Totally like a bootstrap. Yeah. Bootstrap high growth mentality. Right?
Young Han (26:13):
Yeah. Even if it's like the it's an uncomfortable situation. Like, I mean, even just like, for example, if you don't mind me putting some of the information on blast a little bit, like, you're talking about like, Hey, the biggest conundrum right now is recruiting. And you know, like if you can get through these next two months will be in a much better position at the other side of the bridge and da, da, da. But like, there's not a part of you that's stressing out about it. You're like enjoying the problem that you have to solve for two months. You're like, yeah, I'm gonna marinate the fact that this is a problem. And it's not like you're not solving for it, but you're not like freaking out about it. You're like literally enjoying the journey as you go. It's kind of this almost like Zen perspective
Anthony Serina (26:46):
It's interesting. I don't know what you've seen working with other companies, but you know, we've been doing this for eight and a half years and I feel like you, when you run a company, when you start a startup and you're growing, you have a lot of like near death experiences, right. Or you have, have, yeah. You have some really, really, really difficult challenges that you feel you can't overcome, but that never really ends. However, when those tough situations arise or when, when it becomes really challenging, I do believe over time, you just become more confident and being a bit more Zen about it. It's like, okay, we're going through this period. Here's what we need to do. And let's just kind of get through it. And you know, there's not much really to talk about it than just like executing, getting it done.
Anthony Serina (27:33):
Right. And so some stuff that we talked about were like half the way there and we just gotta keep grinding it out for the next 60 days. And it's like, it's, it's the, it's like the S curve. I don't know if you've ever seen that. It, you know, then you get all the people hopefully make the right decisions from strategy, perspective personnel decision from that you go through, you know you know, hyper growth phase or growing quicker than we're growing right now, then everything breaks again. And then you just kind of, here's kind of go through the same stuff over and over and over again.
Young Han (28:00):
Right. You're looking at the macro. You just wanna like, make sure you're getting to the, whether you go this way or that way, as long as you're heading in that direction, you're happy
Anthony Serina (28:07):
You just gotta like find a way to, to grind through the more challenging times and when things are going good, you know, do the best you can enjoy him.
Young Han (28:16):
Here's a million dollar question. Do you raise your kid
Anthony Serina (28:18):
Like that? There is something that I believe along with my wife, which is yeah, definitely, probably a little bit more on the stronger sense of things, but I do, we do want our children to feel a sense of scarcity and urgency along with, you know, all obviously the, the, the most important things. Right. You know, the love, the care, the education, the family, the hard work. But yeah, I mean, like, you know, we're putting all, you know, three girls in one bedroom, you know, and, you know, if one of them's like crying and bothering the other one, you know, we want them to feel that a little bit. And so we don't have to do that. You know, we, we can take the third bedroom and turn to, you know a third bedroom for them, but there's a lot of that that, that we want to, you know, instill upon our children because there's like a whole, there's a whole, like a little bit larger philosophy that I think about like happiness basically.
Anthony Serina (29:18):
Right. And so, yeah, the way I think about it is, is, you know, the difference between difference between poverty and prosperity is gratitude and gratitude is the difference between life expectations and reality. And so really putting our children in a position where, you know, they have the ability to proceed and progress, right. And feeling that certain sense of constraint in their childhood. Right. And a little bit of an urgency about get, having to get things done really, in our opinion, gives them the ability to then kind of go out there and flourish by, by giving the certain baseline, if you will.
Young Han (30:03):
That was beautiful, that was amazing. Yeah. I love that. I freaking love that so much. That is incredible. You should write a blog about that so I can read yeah, yeah. Like actually flush out that thought because that's actually really incredible, man. That's really beautiful. And it can of goes into like this whole concept of like, like you wanting to imprint, like the direction, not necessarily like trying to control the micro, right. You're like, Hey, I just want them to head in this general direction and I'm gonna do that by instilling these behaviors and these kind of concepts and values. Right. Of like gratitude of grit, you know, or like having these like sense of, of urgency. Like, it's really, really interesting because you know, a lot of parents are, you know, very big on nature, nurture and like embodying the example that they want to instill versus like teaching them. Like, there's just a lot of variables and there's no right answer, there's no right answer.
Anthony Serina (30:57):
There's no right answer. And all the kids are different and every kids, the kids are different. That's right. So you have this like, and then it might like completely backfire with one kid. And then you're like, you're really, you know, corner up against the wall. You're like, change it with one kid, but what am I do with the other ones? What about, what about you Young? How do you think about it?
Young Han (31:14):
I'm the worst parent in the world. So, you shouldn't ask me. I love my kids and I'm like the biggest pushover man. I like, they ask like three or four times and I just give in like, my wife constantly tells me, I have like four kids. Cause my dog is a kid too. She's like I have four kids. Like I need another parent sometimes because you're literally, like why would that be a good idea? And I'm like, I feel like it's a good idea. And you know, I, I love donuts for breakfast. It sounds let's do that. And so I'm a big pushover, man. I try to be a parent. I try to be, I'm a good disciplinarian, but dude, I just like, they start crying or like they, you know, they ask me a couple more times, they like, you know, good. They're like the best salespeople ever, you know, they're just like, they just consistently ask like, can I have a cookie? Can I have a cookie? I'm like, why can't I have a cookie? What, what, what's wrong? I see cookie right there. Like you have a cookie.
Anthony Serina (32:06):
You could both have cookies, so much mental fortitude.
Young Han (32:10):
Oh yeah. It it's so hard. And like, it's also like, you know, am I doing it wrong? Am I doing it right? I'm not entirely sure. You know? And like, I think Lilly is much more aware of like, you know, common sense and courteousness and all those things, because you know, like me and Amy, like equally spend a lot of time on her first one, but our second one, I'm like a complete pushover. And, and so she's gonna be a world class B I preemptively apologize to the world because I'm spoiling that one, rotten. Like I can't even control it. Like she is, she just has me wrapped around her finger and I try so hard and she knows it. She just knows that she can get away with anything with me. So it's, it's really bad. So I wouldn't take my advice on that. It's very, but I like your idea of like, not worrying about the micro cause then it gives me hope that I could still be a good parent and focus on the macro. And I've been really thinking about like, you know, like teaching them like overarching things of like controlling, controlling your destiny, like, you know, getting what you want, being aggressive, being confident and those kind of things. And then on the more micro things, I've just been like trying to like inject my personal ambitions towards them. Cause I really want them to be musicians really. So I, are you,
Anthony Serina (33:22):
Are you into music? A lot?
Young Han (33:24):
I would, I would've loved to have been a musician growing up. I just wasn't good enough to do that professionally and my mom had to have the honest conversation, like you're not that good dude. Yeah. It's not gonna happen. Someone has to tell you. And so she told me that and I went down business, but I just had like this desire to like play music with my girls. And it was like, that'd be like a dream of mine. Right. I'd be so happy. I'd be like in heaven. If my girls like sang songs with me and stuff. And so that's kind of where I wanna push them towards. But you know, obviously you, you don't wanna, like, I've heard in both ways. And so I don't know what your take on this is, but I've heard people say, if you have like music in your life and that's just the standard, so they'll grow up playing music, cuz that's just what it is. That's how your family operates. Right. Or you keep it open ended and then you just encourage and nurture them exploring. And if they find music then you're and then you nurture it. Right. It's like, there's like this whole polarity. I don't know if you've ever heard of this, but like, like setting the example incorporating you into the life. It becomes, it becomes what you do. It's just standard versus like, you know, letting them explore it and figure it out for themselves. I, I don't know what your take on that is
Anthony Serina (34:30):
Like the certain values you want to have, like with your children maybe to, to some degree or
Young Han (34:35):
I think values, I think are inherently standard cuz you can't really control that. Right. Cuz you're gonna end up like disciplining and incur. I guess that's not true because certain kids will react to discipline and encouragement in the opposite way.
Anthony Serina (34:48):
Young Han (34:49):
That's the reason there's no, there's no. Yeah, yeah. There's no playbook for this. Yeah. There's no playbook for this.
Anthony Serina (34:57):
I'm really interested to see cuz like our kids are still really young as they start really. Yeah. Become more independent. How do you deal with the different personalities? I think that's gonna be interesting thing. Like my wife and I talked about there, like with three kids, one of 'em might be artistic. One of 'em might be like, you know, really good with numbers. Another one might be more into athletics. And how do you like manage all those different types of things? And as a parent, aren't getting excited about all those different things. Right. So if you're equally excited, like I know things that excite me, you know, <laugh> that's right. So that's right. Totally excited about the music stuff. Right. So let's say, let's say one of your kids like is all in, on, on music and you know, picks up an instrument as like fantastic at it and like wants all lessons and you're like loving it. And then like, you know, one of, one of your other kids is into athletics and maybe that's like not, you know, not, you know, not, not up your path or something like that. And so you're trying to figure out, you wanna be just as excited about the per you know, whichever kid, you know, is doing athletics just as you would about, you know, whoever's involved with the music.
Young Han (36:01):
Yeah. I know it's gonna be hard because my wife's super into sports and I'm not right. She wants them to be super athletic. So like, like she wants them to play sports and like be outdoors and like play with bugs and all sorts of things. And I'm like, no, <laugh> play music, you know? Like, and I just want them to be in arts and, and, and like music, but yeah. I mean, yeah, I gotta get excited about it. I gotta learn and how to do that. I mean, cuz the alternate is that I just say, Hey, you're your mom's kid and then you'll be my kid, right. My, which is terrible. Yeah. Yeah. Hey I, I know this has been a really great conversation. I could probably talk to you about this for hours, but I do wanna be mindful of your time and I know you're running a very successful company and so I just wanna make sure that we're wrapping up here with four questions that I like to ask every single guest. So let me go and fire those off for you so I can get you outta here. Okay. Sure. All right. So what advice do you have for other parents and soon to be parents,
Anthony Serina (36:58):
Not a fan of giving advice? Cause I feel like advice comes with so much personal baggage. Yeah. What I will say is what I've experienced and if anyone's listening, what they can take from it, you know, for themselves. And I think the outside of obviously all the, the, the immense amount of joy and, and every children bring is I was really unprepared personally for the amount of logistics and planning that goes into having kids. And so I never really understood. I'm like, oh, your kid's napping so I can do whatever I want. And I didn't realize like, no, you have clean bottles. You have to make lunch. You, you have to like all that type of stuff. So that's the one, that's a small thing, but just the amount of logistics and being able to handle that. I think it's like the third component that isn't spoken about enough where if your work then obviously if the relationships with your children, when you're with them, and then you just have this like logistical plan and component, they really didn't appreciate enough. I'm fortunate enough to have a better wife than, than me that, you know, really runs point on it. But you know, as, as we've had obviously three kids now, I'm, I'm involved in, in a ton of it as well. And so that was the one surprise to me, but I mean, you know, it's the best right? Have, have having kids the absolute best. That was my well, that's my one surprise. So if it would be things that I would've prepared for in advance was really trying to think about, Hey, how's the best, how do I handle planning the best? What's the best way of going about it. And, and, and everything like that.
Young Han (38:33):
Awesome. You kind of answered a couple of the next questions, but I'm still let ask it and you can repeat it if you need be.
Anthony Serina (38:38):
So if you can go back and tell yourself one thing before having kids, what would it be? I would tell myself two exercise even more than I was doing before, because it is really hard to get workouts in with th the variability of all these schedules as is what I say, right? Like you can't control you can't, if you wanna wake up early in the morning to, to go work out and then one of the kids just ended up waking up early, you you're done. So I, I just you're done.
Young Han (39:16):
I wish I would've even gotten in, you know, more workouts and more routines to gimme more of baseline from where I'm at right now. What's your all time favorite business book?
Anthony Serina (39:17):
I do find traditional business books, to be honest with you quite, quite boring. So yeah, I'm not really too big on, I like stories more than anything else.
Young Han (39:26):
Yeah. You're an artist!
Anthony Serina (39:29):
Maybe I dunno.
Young Han (39:31):
Yeah. Yeah. I dunno. What is the most surprising thing that you learned about self after becoming a parent?
Anthony Serina (39:38):
How much patience that I have? Probably something I didn't realize, you know, how much patience I have. I'm a pretty antsy high anxious, like high gunning type personality, like to like, you know, that like to work for.
Young Han (39:56):
I do. Yeah. You're not patient at all.
Anthony Serina (39:59):
I'm inpatient. Right. And how much patients I've seen with having these kids just it's really been forced at. It's been a really, really healthy thing. It's been really amazing. Cause like, you know, you, you know, you're holding two kids or say you're watching three and you know, one of 'em so happy, you know, watching TV or, or playing with a toy, you're reading the one, another one starts crying. And it's just like, you accept that it's not a hundred percent in your control. And if you try and control everything, you're just gonna set yourself up for failure. And I think it just requires a tremendous amount of patience and it's been really, really, really cool in that part, I think. And, and I think it's helped me a lot of work as well.
Young Han (40:40):
Yeah. That's great. I love that's carried over to work too. That's fantastic. Hey, Anthony, I just wanna say thank you so much for spending time with me to talk to me about parenting and your kids and family. I had a ton of fun having you on the show and I learned a ton and a lot of nuggets that I'm sure all the listeners were able to pull from as well, especially your thing about prosperity and a gratitude. I think that that was really, really interesting. And I can't wait to encourage, continue to encourage you to write a blog about it, to further elaborate your concept. Cuz I think there's a lot to be said about your navigation of parenting and it's very, very special. So thank you again for taking the time, man.
Anthony Serina (41:17):
My first podcast I'm I couldn't be happier with you Young. So it's been, it's been fun. Oh, it's been fun. So I'm interested to see how it all comes out. So it's great.
Young Han (41:26):
Very good. Thank you very much. I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
Thanks for tuning in to another episode of the girl dad show, we really hope you enjoyed that interview. And as always, please take a moment to review, rate and subscribe. We'll see you next time.
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